Lack of Independence

Well the diet is not the only thing Im struggling with today.  A lack of independence is really starting to give me some unwanted anxiety and depression.  My body can't seem to do the things that used to be so simple.  My abilities very from day to day even hour to hour but not being able to write or bathe, see or stand, walk, cook, clean, etc is wearing on me.  Saturday night I was very week and in some pain.  Sunday I stayed in bed most of the day b/c I wasn't feeling well and Aaron was very sick.  Today I woke up fine but after an hour of being up my legs weren't working and I was hurting.  It is frustrating to feel so limited.  To have to decide between showering or doing the dishes because I can only stand long enough to do one or the other.   And there is the always looming risk of falling because of weakness and lack of balance.  Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day because today I am super frustrated (not to mention the no carbs no sugar which means no comfort food).

I am grateful for an amazing husband who is being very helpful and supportive as well as my Mom who listens to me vent no matter what time of day it is.  It is hard to feel so crummy and look fine and it is hard being bounced from doctor to doctor.